Words of advice from a crazy (and wonderful) Irishwoman from Nebraska (paraphrased and condensed):
When you’ve hit bottom, when you’ve reached the end of your rope, you’ve got to get down on your knees and say: “I promise I WILL learn what I need to learn from all this. Please, just make it easier and lighter and gentler. I will listen. And I will learn.” If you ask with all your heart, things will turn around. You’ve just got to keep your end of the bargain.
So this is me getting down on my knees and amending my contract: I will listen. And I will learn. Just go easy on me okay?